" Okay, just quit hitting me," I joke."You came home and now, instead of the dildo, Kristina wants you to take her virginity!" What? Wait! No!" I stam...er. "I've never done that before." Neither has she," she counters, mockingly."No... but... I mean... her first time?" This is unfathomable. "What if I hurt her?" It's going to hurt anyway." I know but... her first time should be really special don't you think?" I ask, wondering why I'm arguing about getting to be the first cock to slide into that. I had to take another drink. “You keep changing the subject. First it’s a man, then it’s a button, now it’s a nut. Which is what I’m beginning to think you are.” “I don’t mean to be obscure,” Carlotta said. “I’m talking about my spark plug. You must have heard of what I’m referring to?” “I don’t think so, lady,” I said. I rolled my eyes and took another drink. A big drink. “Now it’s internal combustion engines; I’m getting a headache.” “I’ve got to find a man who can finger my pearl of. More

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