..pulsing and threatening, through every fiber of my body, butnot doing anything harsh just yet.The minute I leaned my full back into his chest he cir...led me with hisarms from behind. He folded my arms under his and held my hands,together with his, in my lap. My breathing deepened as the fearmounted, but I tried so hard to trust him again, and to be strongthrough the pain I knew I deserved. It was all I really knew how to doany more, all I wanted to do now, all I ever really needed to do. . But I still long to proudly wear his steel again, to have that something that I can reach up and grab a hold of and be reminded in some small, self-absorbed way of being able to physically be reassured that I am, indeed, his. I think of the things he has noticed and pointed out to me already, small changes that I hadn’t really noticed myself but once pointed out, embarrassed because it was true. Speaking first person comes to mind quickly because even writing in this forum, I speak it but now,. More

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