From close examination of Barely Legal, I knew this mixture of filth and innocence turned my dad on more than anything. My mum, bless her, was fairly ...blivious, I don't think she registered it at all. She'd got quite used to me turning any outfit, my school uniform included, into the sluttiest version possible. My dad was not oblivious. He went to the pub to watch the football, and when he came back he'd clearly had a few pints in him. And he was openly learing at me. At one point I swear he. ‘It’s not like in the store, is it?’ Janice pointed out. We shook our heads. ‘There’s a reason the food looks so nice in the store,’ she said. ‘There’s also a reason it doesn’t taste so good. People have gotten used to perfect-looking vegetables and the stores have learned there’s no point in putting out anything even slightly deformed, it won’t sell. Tomatoes, in particular, have been bred to travel well, so they look great on the store shelves, even after traveling hundreds of miles in a big. More

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