It's not funny. I need your help."Half in the bottle, I must have sounded crazy. I'd explain everything toher tomorrow while I was completing my chore....I must have drifted off because the chime of the cell woke me.I actually dreaded opening it.The message was from Kelli, her bubbly face smiling in the image: I'vegot a surprise for you tomorrow. Don't get scared or nervous, but I'mhaving some......No. You'll have to wait and see. But it's going to be alaugh-riot. I promise you you'll be safe.. "Excuse my manners."I shake my head to let her know it's OK and I continue, "I know someone who has the same problem with women. Can't stand the thought of them." I think for a moment and get a little disheartened. "So you're coming after me tonight because I'm wearing a strap-on?"She sits up and emphatically shakes her head no. "Oh god no, that's just a bonus! After a couple of weeks of moping around, I kept thinking about you. Not like I was obsessed, but I wanted to let you know I was. More

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