Laurie is coming ... No, Jim ... you have to go.”So ... while I found my kit ... the wife and Next-door Jim sat in the kitchen, Jim drinking my beer...and the walking talking watermelon drinking my soda. It’s been a while since gold had lured me away from my diminutive bride ... I had other things to do. Witness the painful back ... swollen breasts ... trips to the restroom to rest every fifteen minutes ... and the oddest idea of what tasted good ... like dill pickles in ranch dressing ... or. At the time, it felt like it was about an hour before she said anything, but it was probably only a few seconds."What would you say if I told you I was, Sean? Would you be happy? Or would it upset you?"I felt like my head was going to explode. "Is it mine?" I croaked.I heard her sigh on the other end of the line. "I'm going to make your day, Sean, and maybe even give Kristina Mendoza a little gift in the process." I could hear her take a big breath before continuing. "There is no baby. I'm not. More

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