And knowing we’d be life partners was monumental to me.But we had to be practical, too. I wasn’t about to leap without looking. Our relationship h...d not been stressed; had not been tested. It had been magical. I needed to know that Joshua was committed to me more than the lust that existed between us.I needed to know how he would react under duress. My major was behavioral psychology and it told me I had developed a compulsion about Joshua. I was not about to marry him if my compulsion would. Our relationship started togrow weaker. Over the next few weeks, I regularly searched forwork but I could never find anything. The local shopping mallgave me a few hours cleaning but it was only a few dollars. Marybecame less impressed with me as time continued. She often cameback from work very tired where as I had spent the morningworking and the afternoon looking for work. It was nothing likeher current workload. I knew that some of her friends lived thelife of leisure while their husbands. More

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