The only thing that had changed since our talks about her cheating was that I tried to avoid going to bed with her by saying there was something on TV...that I wanted to watch. The reason for not going to bed was twofold, I wanted to continue drinking to black out my dreams and also I did not feel like having sex with her after I knew that she was not being open and honest with me.Some might say that I was angry that she was cheating but I had gotten over my anger with her some time ago. I. It’s weird really, I mean why should a security system that you can’t see make you feel safe, but somehow if I knew that no one was looking then I could do what I wanted; like look at kink on the computer and be naked all the time. I really liked that, I could be nude all day, in the house and in the garden. It was great to be able to walk out of the back door knowing that if the system wasn’t bleeping then I could be as brazen as I liked. There is something wonderfully free about spending a. More

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