Looked to be about 30. I murmured “fuck” to myself, and the babe responds with “well ya honey, that's the idea” “ I assume that all you boys...out here are really straight”? “Well, yes mamm, cept for one—he's really gay.” “That 's great, and if you call me mamm again—we stop, and you don't get paid---got it”? I snap out a response of “got it” without adding a title. “So---you the one they call TAZ”? “Ya, that's me” She continues with “so is it really all that big, Mr. Taz”? I flash a smile at her. It was, rather, a profound wordless knowing that we shared a wound we couldn't talk about but which we somehow knew we could trust the other not to tear open.When Donny died it was like having the skin torn off my body. An essential part of my life was gone. The sense of safety I'd had for so long slipped away. For awhile I went through the motions, then I tried to clutter up my mind with distractions, and finally I fell into depression.I don't remember trying to get out of that shadowed hole.. More

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