My name is Tess U. U is the initial of my last name, which I won't tell you. You don't need to know. Let's preserve a bit of anonymity. On the interne..., where we can be anonymous. Yay.My name is Tess U. and I don't have a boyfriend. Well, I have boyfriends, but they're all gay. Good to talk to, but no use when I get wet between the legs. Which happens often. My fingers won't cut it. Fortunately, I'm also the owner of the world's only miniature portal gun. You know, the one from the famous game.. Then I heard someone clear their throat behind me. I whipped my hand out of my pants and jumped up, my laptop dropping to the floor with a thud. Jenny's dad was standing there with his arms crossed. I could see a little bulge in the crotch of his fancy suit pants, and a small smile appeared across my face. "What do you think you are doing, young lady?" he asked me, a serious look on his face. I began to panic. I couldn't get fired; I needed this job! I tried to answer, but no noise came out of. More

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