Andas the job has become a joke so has the man. It has been a hundred yearssince we stood before the gate of Vienna while the infidels trembled. And...t has probably been a hundred years since a real man sat the throne of theSublime Porte on the shores of the Golden Horn. Now he sits in his haremand we his four wives bicker and scheme for his favor. At the time of this story Selim was actually a handsome man. When Constanzacame into our lives he was not the elderly corpulent buffoon usually. It was my best selling book, doing quite well as a gag gift and a favorite parting shot from women towards their newly ex-ed boyfriends.A new department head was appointed a month after my book came out. He was a smarmy little fuck that reminded me of the worst critics I ever met. I wondered how he got the job without having published anything, until a fellow associate professor showed me some of his old articles.The new head had been a famous literary critic.He threw a 'get to know my staff'. More

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