"Lupe is not a gang girl. I'm not in the gang. We're not carrying drugs. We're not shoplifting or turning tricks. Rico expects us to do nothing more t...an get good grades and stay out of trouble. Stay. Out. Of. Trouble. He was pissed that I stood up to the little pricks on school grounds. He warned me not to put my future in peril – to let the people with no future do the heavy lifting. If I tried to get into his gang, he'd beat the shit out of me. No, that's not even right. He would drag me to. I could have complete control over any situation.A boyfriend would feel entitled to make demands on my time, on my attention, to have some say in the relationship. What did I need that for when I could get everything I wanted at no cost?Maybe this wasn't love and forever after; maybe it was just infatuation. Perhaps I had just been caught up in the moment. It was a most excellent moment to be sure, but a moment nonetheless.I loved being with Jeff, but I could do that whenever I wanted without. More

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