In the middle of the night, the guy in the middle wakes up, and says to the man next to him “Let me out. I have GOT to get to my wife! I have the bi...gest hard-on I have ever had, and I’ve got to get to her NOW!” The other guy says “Okay. Do you want me to come with you?” “What the hell for?” asks the other. “Because that’s MY dick you’re holding!” he says.A blonde walked into a doctor’s office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her “What happened to your ear?” The blonde replied “I was. Meeting went that well, huh?”Darius grimaced. “Yeah, not so great.”She laughed and shook her head before returning to her work. “I told you not to make a mountain out of a molehill.” Her fingers flew across the keyboard, clacking away.“Well I’m glad you think it’s funny, cause it doesn’t sound like either of us qualifies for unemployment. We got no income.”“Not true” she replied, holding up her index finger sternly.“How’s that?”“Come over here” she said, patting the sofa cushion next to her.. More

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