"I did a lot of exploration and discovery. By the time I felt ready to settle down, I was no longer meeting eligible women. All the women I reached ou... to seemed to have their own agendas and were only focused on what was in it for them. Eventually, I gave up on my active search, as I didn't want to face more disappointment. I buried myself in my career, my volunteer work and my garden. Though I knew there was a void in my life, I was content ... till now. Jayne, having you this close to me and. I then sat at the dining table and put my head in my hands.I cried. I cried for my sister, her husband and their baby, my nephew. I cried for my parents dead in that accident. I cried for Dot and Sue and their parents. I cried for Sam and Angie and their parents. I cried for the man I shot who had killed their dad and mom. I cried for myself. I just let it out. I was tired of death. I was tired of being alone. The tension of always being watchful, of having no one watching my back, was dragging. More

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