Fortunately my flashback now is as brief as ever. It almost gives me a glimpse of an infinite horror but then my mind pushes the nightmare away. But I...don't want to stand here anymore. I feel too exposed. I am vulnerable, and I absolutely don't have the guts to stay here. After gingerly testing the weight of my two suitcases again, I resume my march. I take another three steps, and then my wrists leave me crying in agony. My mental defenses fail in the intense pain and I am swept back fully. Ben is a nervous wreck. He regrets having convinced his parents to let him move by himself so he could be independent and not get embarrassed. Instead, he feels scared and alone on his first day away from home. School isn’t the fear, he’s crazy smart. Becoming an independent adult isn’t a fear either as he’s going to do just fine for himself as a biochemical engineering and physics double major. The fear is the students. Living with another guy. Sharing a bathroom with 20 guys. It all gives him. More

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