I’m so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.The other day I came home early and a guy was jogging, naked. I asked him, �...�Why?’ He said, ‘Because you came home early.’My wife’s such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer.I know I’m not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.My wife is such a bad cook. In my house we pray after the meal.My wife likes to talk to me during sex; last night she called me from a hotel.It’s been a. She nodded, ‘None of the boys ever try to make it good for me any more,’ she whispered. There was a slight catch in her voice, ‘They just want to fuck and go.’ I thought I saw a tiny tear forming in the corner of her eye, but she looked down and I could not be sure. I guessed that something had happened before we met up to upset or hurt her. The other times that I had been with Sharon, I had never really got into fore play with her, just a few minutes snog then straight into energetic shagging.. More

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