Pigs don't hum.To get him ready for the big day, when I would take the Pig to our annual Lakefront Summer Fest, I first vac-cu-pumped his fat teen pri...k every day for a week until it was swollen to monstrous proportions and almost as thick as a beer can. He sobbed when he saw that his precious dickie was ruined for life. I just laughed. He had not had much experience with pumping a prick. Even flaccid now it hung almost eight inches and was so fat and swollen it looked obscene in a bathing suit. " Do any of the colleges offer Latin?" I asked."One, but I believe the class doesn't start until a little after two."I thought for a second. "What are the third and fourth period classes?" Civics and English, respectively," the principal replied. "Why?" What about for ninth grade?" Spanish I and French I." I'll take those."The principal frowned. "You're planning on taking Latin at college. You're also taking German. Four languages are too hard." Spanish and French are Romance languages, derived. More

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