The cucumber was just 50 pence from thelocal market, and it was barely half ten when I totted up I was already at 33 points. Walking back down the Hig... Street, I noticed a faded sign down one of the back alleys 'LAUNDRETTE' and almost ran down it to the tatty shop with open doors.I peered in through the open door and was amazed to find that only two people were there. One was busy with their washing and their back to the door, while someone else was reading a newspaper. On top of the machines. I was well ahead of both guys in my alcohol consumption, but I needed to be. I knew that I was now well passed being ‘legally drunk’. I could feel my tongue thicken as I spoke. I was slurring my words ever so slightly. And, the alcohol caused my language to become cruder.“Okay, gentlemen…I want you to shuck those clothes. Let me see those boners that you intend to pry me open with…I’m ready to ‘inspect the goods’…C’mon, show me your cocks,” I insisted, my tongue thickening by the second. The. More

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