. I saw my mate Charlie this morning, he’s only got one arm bless him.I shouted - “Where you off to Charlie?”He said, “I’m off to change a l...ght bulb.”“That’s gonna be a bit awkward init?”“Not really.” he said. “I still have the receipt, you insensitive bastard.”Went out last night and got really wasted.I woke up this morning next to a fat old bird who was snoring.So, at least I got home OK.Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control in Athens airport.“Nationality?” asks the immigration. He managed to free himself from Felicity's tight embrace and made his way back over to the body lying on the grass. Kneeling down, he felt for a pulse at the exposed neck and was satisfied when there wasn't one."I'm pretty sure he's dead," he said."Oh god. What are we going to do now?" Flick asked."Help is only ever one phone call away as they say," Mark replied.He pulled his mobile phone from the pocket of his jeans and hit one of the speed dial buttons."I'm sorry to phone this late at night. More

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