I hadn't expressed these feelings to Ardele, at least not fully. She had encouraged me to let go of the past and accept that my mother was a different...person than she was then and that she understood just how deeply she had hurt me and my father. She had punished herself for years over a single act of reckless stupidity and had somehow come to terms with it. Now, Ardele told me, it was my turn to make some emotional changes.Our conversation took place the day before our wedding. We weren't. I thought I was going to choke on his penis, but he pulled it out. Dripping wet with my saliva. And it left a weird taste in my mouth and also a creepy vacant feeling. The feeling as if I was meant to suck him. As if my mouth was incomplete without him in it.He ravaged the remaining skirt off my body and now we were naked. Completely. Me, a respectable girl of a nice family and him, probably a roadside stalker a labourer I don ‘t know who or what.He kissed me again. His one hand on my. More

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