I got quite good with a .40. I ended up buying my own Heckler & Koch USP handgun in the .40 configuration. I even applied for a concealed carry permit... When it was granted I never actually used it, but it felt good knowing I could.I have no idea why I was suddenly so obsessed with self-defense, in all its different aspects. I had some fuzzy idea that I was trying to learn how to never be in that situation with someone like Sam again, where all I did was take it. He was bigger than me, stronger. I wanted him inside me so bad, I wanted the closeness, the connection with him, but I knew the pain would be overwhelming. I searched online for different suggestions on how prepare for his size, most of the answers were obvious, dildos or having sex with someone else that was a smaller size. I finally decided I was going to bring the subject back up to him, and suggest using dildos. We had a date this saturday, so it would be a perfect opportunity. We met at a little restaurant, I could tell. More

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