There he stood, lopsided grin on his face, naked as was his required norm at home, but wearing a green elf hat, a red collar with jingle bells attache..., pointed green felt elf booties on his feet, and the piece-de-resistance; several six inch strands of tinker bells attached and hanging down from the plastic cage in which his ‘manhood’ was almost always kept encased . ?Merry Christmas, Mistress.? he said as his smile broadened, and he dropped to his knees, the bells jingling merrily. . " Remind me to raise your allowance." You just did, dear. After he built the awning last week," his wife reminded him."Well, I can raise it again, can't I?" Not unless Bill Miller plans to give you a raise. We'll have to trade him in on a cheaper son." Mom grinned at me, making sure I knew she'd never trade me in. "Good game tonight. You guys humiliated the Badgers." So how come my all-star son, who is Jim Thorpe reincarnated, spent most of the night receiving instead of throwing," Dad wanted. More

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