I wanted to do it on my own terms with a big "Fuck You" to society for having expectations of me (for being a woman). Remember how I said I was naive?...Yeah, that's part of the story. I thought I had the balls to do it. I posted an ad on Craiglist about wanting to lose my virginity. And wow, I was overwhelmed with the response. With my excuse to my parents I was doing overtime, I met a few guys... blowjobs for the most part. Those men didn't really wanted to have sex. Maybe they were scared, but. He was too skinny to be athletic, but he was heavy on his feet for lack of muscle tone. His awkwardness made him gauche without the saving grace of disarming innocence. A decent exercise would fix that. A more difficult problem was that he was too shy to look anyone in the face so he kept his eyes averted. That gave him the air of someone who always had something more interesting to do somewhere else. His voice was soft and that made him easily ignored. No matter how clever his remarks, they. More

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