I wasn’t man enough, wasn’t male enough. The very love I’d shown her had made me feminine and weak, cloying and indecisive. I couldn’t live wi...h myself, couldn’t look at myself in the mirror. I loathed myself. My very work—my plays, my stories and poems—seemed effete, gutless, and unmanned. I told April. Of course I told April, but there was little she could do, and how much sympathy can you expect from your lover when you break up with your wife? She was wonderful to give me what she did.. , I won’t bore you with too many details but the work had been planned to take place over a 4 week period, so the company had booked me into a hotel that was predominantly tourist, this hotel was part of a vast complex of hotels and leisure facility’s in a park, there were about 5 hotels all linked by tiny roads, little or no traffic was allowed In the park and the transport around was supplied by 6 tractors done up with steam engine faces etc. like “Thomas the tank engine” these vehicles. More

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