”“Yes, mom, I promised you in first grade that I wouldn’t have sex with a boy or man until I finished high school. I’m still a virgin. I artif...cially inseminated myself,” she told her mom and watched the look of shock on her mom’s face. “I never told you the father’s name because I technically molested him from two weeks after my first period until I managed to stay pregnant the first time. Now quit being a bitch and help me get the kids settled before bedtime.”She turned to me and said, “I. It'll be great, you'll enjoy it." What? Sit in here all afternoon when it's so nice out. Can't you watch the highlights on TV tonight?" asked Jody."Yes, you spend too much time in pubs as it is." I added."No, it's not the same," said Gary. "Come on, it's only once a year."I knew it was hopeless. For those of you in the US it's like the Super Bowl but with soccer. But Jodi wasn't giving up and played her trump card. "Aww come on Brendan, I know a nice sheltered spot by the lake where we can have. More

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