I luxuriated in it, washing my hair twice and taking the opportunity to check my shaving was adequate. One month ago “I have to be in London in ab...ut 5 weeks time” No build up, this was the first thing she said when she got online. “Oh, wow.” “I want to meet you.” “I’d like that too.” “Well, let’s then?” “Oh, god, yes, please.” “I’ll let you know the dates.” “Wonderful.” “Where’s my email?” “Oh, I simply haven’t had time.” “Hmmmm” “I am sorry.” “You will be – grin” Over our next few chats and. Not just self-lubing, but it adapts itself to any asshole shape and size, auto-cleans the rectum so there’s no poop accidents, intelligently induces maximum gape in the wearer by stimulating the rectal walls and automatically sensing gape-width. It will even pulsate rhythmically in tandem with whether you’re being fucked in the cunt, or even just rubbing your clit. Oh, and it beeps when you need a poop! But hey – another golden oldie! Remember this one, Jill? We used to fuck to this at uni…”. More

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