He proved himself unworthy and removed himself from the picture. I can't really articulate how I feel about this but every bit of it reinforces this.....self-awareness I'm experiencing. Like, I am an entity, a whole, stand-alone person. I used to think of Ethan as a piece of me. An extension of self that I needed; but now I think I felt that way because it wasn't Ok for me to want things. Like, I only ever deserved what I needed. Not anymore. Almost overnight I feel -- quite comfortably -- that. I looked at her in a way that said I expected her to continue. “I mean I’m not pregnant so…” she gestured at nothing and nobody. “Congratulations,” I said. “On not having a child.” I laughed a little bit. She smiled. “I actually have to…” She stuck her thumb out at her car as if it was a faraway object. I almost interrupted her. Women love it when you almost, but not quite, interrupt them. Wait for them to finish then jump in immediately after the final syllable has exited their lips. It means. More

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